It doesn’t take much for the mind to wander. Wonder if the soul would follow?

I’ve been spending too much time in this Coffee Bean café lately; it’s becoming a cold habit. Nisa calls it my “office”. (But what work do I do here?) In fact, I came right over after my morning gym workout (and that’s another slow thread in my life now - fitness for the body while the mind meanders). Almost always I order the same thing - a pot of tea - sometimes Earl Grey, sometimes Chai, but usually the same pot of Vanilla Ceylon that I drink with hot milk and a dash of nutmeg.

It warms me up in these cold days. The afternoon are hours of rainstorms.

Nisa called me up, asking if I wanted to watch a movie with her; she’s keen on Cinta (a Malaysianised pseudo-version of Love is All Around directed by a Bollywood name), but I am tired of that emotion and films that offer it up, poppyfieldstrawberryjoy. No, I can’t stomach it right now.

The archives are coming along nicely. I’ve transfered Sep ‘01 through half of Dec ‘01 of my Being HERE journals. I’m trying my best not to balk at these harsh samples of my naïveté; I will not censor myself. The memories are like searushes; I can’t stop them coming. Whether I get consumed by them or not is perhaps a foregone conclusion. This is me. This is how I am.

I think I want to depart from this starkly bright place now. Time to go and breathe some real air.

~ * ~

Current Mood: Disconnected.
Current Music: Beyoncé - Irreplaceable