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Janis Joplin is screaming over the stereo. It’s summer and I’m at Woodstock again. Take another little piece of my heart now, baby. Sweet, tender pieces of my heart. Morsels you can savour with a cup of pu erh, a tea with wit strong enough to sustain you. Taste my har gao and taste my siu mai. You’ll taste none better in this town.
In return, let me nibble at your soft and pillowy siu long bao, let me rub my lips with your sticky lou mai gai. You have dug your phoenix talons deep into me, and I cannot let you go… not without one last bite of your heavenly lo bak gou, my little miss dimsum…
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Photograph & design by Kenny Mah.
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Notes on the dim sum:
1. Har gao (蝦餃): A delicate steamed dumpling with whole or chopped-up shrimp filling and thin wheat starch skin.
2. Siu mai (燒賣): Small steamed dumplings with pork inside a thin wheat flour wrapper. Usually topped off with crab roe and mushroom.
3. Pu erh (普洱茶): A strong, fermented tea.
4. Siu long bao (上海小籠包): Dumplings filled with meat or seafood, famous for their flavour and rich broth inside.
5. Lou mai gai (糯米雞): Glutinous rice dumpling wrapped in a lotus leaf into a triangular or rectangular shape; contains egg yolk, dried scallop, mushroom, water chestnut and meat (usually pork and chicken).
6. Phoenix talons (鳳爪 fung zao): These are chicken feet, deep fried, boiled, marinated in a black bean sauce and then steamed.
7. Lo bak go (蘿蔔糕): Cakes made from mashed daikon radish mixed with bits of dried shrimp and pork sausage that are steamed and then cut into slices and pan-fried.
[ Information derived from Wikipedia. ]
Who knew dim sum could be so sexy and erotic? You naughty boy!
I don’t know how you do it but there you have it, the only mash-up ever of dim sum and Janis and the resultant mid-afternoon se-xay innuendoes! Jeepers, har gaos and xiu long baos are never going to taste the same again!!
How delightfully naughty!
Am impressed ..i would love to see you savour your dim sum one day.….;)
Learn from the elders on how to eat dim sum. Small little morsels by little morsels. Then a sip of tea. While the morning away. The young have theirs way too quickly.
I totally dig JJ..my father let me listen to her records, deep purple, yet he likes Mozart too.. Go figure.. I love Yumcha– in Japan though.… I must say, not as good as the places in AU and the US.
“let me rub my lips with your sticky lou mai gai.”…sounds so suspiciously geli…aiyerrrrrr…!!
hmm..wonder if taste nice ah??
Definitely a non-halal post.
OMG.. dim sum!!! directly opposite my college, there’s a dim sum shop… now… should i go for some before classes…?? LOL
“phoenix talons” = chicken feet? how creative! =P
“let me nibble at your soft and pillowy siu long bao, let me rub my lips with your sticky lou mai gai …”
you just sinned. =P
Haha you totally pwned my best sexually-connotated Dim Sum line…
“Do you mind squirting some mayo on my yao-char-kway, please?”
… which btw, was really meant to be an innocent request, literally!
Try Tai Tze Heen at the Prince KL. It is halal but surprisingly very good. Tell me when you are going and I shall recommend you some real good ones.
Kenny, I beg to differ…you make eating dimsum now so “watt tatt”…Eewww!!!
Ewww…this post is just too “salty” and “wet” for my taste. Will never look at those delightful Dim Sum the same way again. Ewww ewwww!
if my lecturers going to chase me out of the class, i’ll make sure i get them some dim sum too… or maybe a pot of tea… LOL
it’s time to have dim sum again!
you have listed out all my favourite food!
when did dim sum bcome the nxt hot thang? haha i prefer my experience as to..i want this this and that..ohh you can join me too..eat..burp and and say bye bye..
Hehe… dim sum will never be the same again
hahaha.. now u making lurve to dimsum.. wot nxt?!
:P
wah lau eh looking at this photo right now when my tummy’s rumbling is definitely not doing me any favors!!!
had a light salad for lunch and now im in desperate need of a 3pm pick me up!!
tell me where i can get some of this sexy dimsum, pls… must have some added aphrodisiacs as ingredients?
The dim sum that you had is so tempting. Would be great to have a dim sum outing with you.
every plate of dim sum speaks of a story. and it’s usually about sex.
and that’s why we love our dim sums so much.
typical conversation:
A: what would u like to do this weekend?
B: let’s do dim sum.
woohoo!
*read Nic’s comment*
HAHAHAHAHA.……
I guess now there’s a “new” word for sex? Love it!!!
Will you be doing the continuation chapters leading up to the finale on the nibs and tits of these delectable dims and the sums of delicate pleasures now that you have unleashed the beginnings of this starting scrumptious pursuit ?
We would unhesitatingly love to audition for some crucial intimate stand-ins and outs if there are as yet unfilled vacancies
TQ
new post, was busy the past two days din check. heh! wow, i never know dim sum can be so erotic. hahahah. and to think i got so many post on dim sum : D
So that’s the pick-up line that you use? With all the phoenix talons and pao?
very kinky… i think i will stick to halal dim sum tho… lol
Long time no eat DIm Sum liao.
esp Ipoh one.
Thanks for the footnotes, otherwise I’d have no idea what all the dishes are! =P
I will never look at dim sum the same way again!
How come I nvr find any dimsum this sexy in my neighborhood?? :p
Half of what you have laid down here are my favorites!
ohhhh…now i muz hv dim sum soon! Rmbr-ed that Ciki n FBB wen to this plc called jin xuan SS2, supposedly better than Hong Kee (also SS2)..myself havent tried it yet tho..
What? You mean these thoughts aren’t running through your head too when you have dim sum in the morning?
… I wonder if Ms. Joplin ever had any dim sum? Heh.
My dear, all you had to do was ask…
Who said anything about having my morsels quickly? Ahem.
Johann Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and Janis Lyn Joplin, it can be argued, both shared a certain genius, not merely for Art but the greater feat of simply entertaining us common folks.
And they were damn good too. So kudos to your father!
As for yum cha, hmmm … I guess it would be rather different in Japan. I guess it’d be more authentic wherever there is a sizeable Chinese population though. I love dim sum in Malaysia, but only at a few select locations.
Any recommendations for a good dim sum place, O fellow readers?
Ah, the answer to that question lies in whose lou mai gai you’re rubbing your lips with…
Nay, there are plenty of halal and kosher dim sum these days. Chinese cuisine has been known to adapt quite well to most tastebuds and dietary requirements. Well, except the one that requires us not to put on extra pounds and kilos after a really good meal.
if she did, i bet her favorite was “phoenix talons”! lol
Very feminine and ferocious at the same time; that sounds about right, doesn’t it? Good one!
Oh you so should… Unless you’re gonna miss your classes, in which case, TAPAU lah!
P.S. Don’t kill me though if your lecturer smokes you out for eating in class though. Oops.
If this is sinning… I don’t ever wanna be a saint!
Ooh, I think you just beat me in the dim sum-as-sexual-innuendos department. I bow before your obviously mightier command of erotic dim sum lines…
Ah, finally! A recommendation… Halal is good, my friend. Makes it easier when I hang out with my Muslim friends and guests. Danke!
The Chinese have been known to be very creative in coming up with fanciful names for their otherwise mundane dishes. I mean, c’mon, would you rather feast on the talons of a powerful phoenix or munch on some chicken feet?
Hehe, you didn’t complain back when we were having dim sum together all those years ago…
Bro, we read what we wanna read from it, no? I actually think it’s kinda spicy, but maybe that’s just me. Hahaha.
Great idea! Make sure you ask them what tea they prefer — right now my favourite is Tiě Guān Yīn (鐵觀音) or Metal Mercy.
(Okay, so the translation should be ‘Iron Goddess of Mercy’ but I like my version better. Heh.)
Err…did we ever had dimsum together?? If we did, and you did say all that, I think we all know where the pot of tea landed :p
That pot of tea? Yeah, that poor waiter. It’s his fault, really. Never interrupt a man when he’s whispering dimly sweet-nothings over dim sum.
Next time Prada and I are in Singapore we do dim sum, okay? Any reccies, O Master Food Reviewer of Singaporean Makan Places?
Ah, Joe. Ever the efficient gourmand.
“Kenny Mah: The Man Who Changed Dim Sum Forever.”
*slaps himself and wakes up from daydream*
… well, that fantasy was nice while it lasted. Hmm.
Isn’t that the exciting part — that you don’t know what comes next? Heh, to be honest, neither do I!
I’m on medical leave today from a bout of diarrhoea so no nice food for me today. Just porridge and oatmeal. A light salad sounds good right about now, really.
Still, do tell me what you had for your 3pm pick-me-up, ‘kay?
Added aphrodisiacs? Hmm… like an oyster siu mai, you mean? That doesn’t sound half bad, actually…
Nay, my lady, it’d be my pleasure to head out for dim sum with you.
Now I wish I was having that conversation way more often. Waitaminute… I am!
yes yes, when you coming to have dim sum?
me no food reviewer. me just go around eating with friends n family.
Sooner than you think…
aiyoh..suddenly my lips feel hot..!!
now..this is suspiciously kinky…!!
(“Do you mind squirting some mayo on my yao-char-kway, please?”)
lol my 3pm pick-me-up which was actually more of a 4.30pm thing ended up with some meatballs and stir fried pumpkin (leftover dishes from an economy rice stall at a nearby kopitiam)
Hmm… this is the first time I’ve heard of a spicy lou mai gai… LOL
Exactly! I lose out to Josh so easily lah… I’m an innocent lamb in comparison. Hee.
Ooh… I love pumpkin in any form… why not combine them together and have pumpkin meatballs?
innocent…hmm, ok…be careful you dont get your mutton squirted with mayo from the yaw-char-kway…hehehe
My “mutton”? Ehh… My mutton has so much appeal and is such a steal that folks call it VEAL.
Awww, we don’t need new words for sex… just new positions?
Any suggestions for future “chapters”, bro?
Ah, so you’re the dim sum expert! Must ask you where the best dim sum in Singapore can be found then.
Pick-up, dine-in, home delivery, the works! LOL
ooo.…veal is it?..i like veal..now, are you able to dish out a veal porridge with century eggs?? that would be lovely..
Egads… how did you know I had porridge with century eggs YESTERDAY??? You’re not a mind reader, are you? Eeks.
As long as it tastes good, I’m all for it, ma’am!
Jom mari pegi ke Ipoh makan dim sum sama-sama? In or out, lil godbrother?
No worries… it’s easy even for regular diners to lose track of what is what — there are so many varieties of dim sum!
More importantly, will you eat it the same way again? Hehe.
hahahaha. I like the ones at Yan Ting @ St regis hotel. Royal China @ Raffles hotel, and Cherry Garden @ Oriental hotel
Sweet! Thanks for the reccies! Must try them all … one at a time.
Guess you might wanna consider changing neighbourhoods? Hehe.
Evergreens they are… Always someone’s favourites. That’s the beauty of dim sum… there’s something for everyone.
Hmm… wanna go together? I’m all for trying more new dim sum places, hehe. Btw, isn’t Hong Kee in Damansara Jaya or did I get the name/place wrong?
as a matter of fact, i am..it’s my part-time job..u want a reading?? no problem…just send a party invitation..hahaha
Gosh, you’re making everyone think I am a perpetual party planner lah… All I do is work, work, work and work some more…
Real boring life!
ya…work..work..work..and travel, travel, travel, and some more eat, eat…eat !!!
Which explains why I am so FAT now!
Need to eat healthier lah. Start exercising again. And all that. Yups.