Things go wrong.
That’s true enough, certainly. And things go wrong all the time, when we least expect them to. Part of the pain comes from being unprepared, from denial, from the shock. We don’t want things to change; pain is when they don’t remain the same. And they never do. Things go wrong.
The past couple of weeks have been a bit of a blur for me, flying around from city to city, one overnight bag swapped for the other when I manage just enough time to stop over at home, give you a kiss, and then I have to head out again, the next taxi to the airport is waiting for me. I rarely read the news when trapped in the conveyor belt of business trips.
Not till I drop off the production line, apparently. (From completion, from exhaustion, does it matter?) Then I have some time to myself, to read, to catch up. And everything’s ill.
Norway. Hate blossoms into so many innocent lives lost. A tragedy on the scale of an entire nation and the rest of the world that weeps with them. Winehouse. The voice, the soul in pain, succumbing finally. More weeping, more waste. Another tragedy.
Everything’s ill, gone wrong.
Last flight of the month; three days up north and I am home again. The taxi driver is grumbling about the evening crawl but he is polite. I smile for the traffic jam cannot ruffle me. I am coming home, to my baby, to you. I see the other cars and vehicles that surround us, the faces inside, strained, sleepy, tired, laughing, hopeful. Human.
I am strained and sleepy and tired too. I press the doorbell and announce, “Pizza Hut Delivery!” I hear the sound of your footsteps hurrying over, the sound of your voice indignantly retorting, “Nobody’s home!” even as you unlock the door, then the gates, the bars between us, then we are in each other’s arms, a big bear hug, quick kisses, then we launch into parallel tirades about how awful our day has been, laughing all the same. I am home with you, and I am reminded to be hopeful always, that the days away will get easier or I will travel less for work in the future, that we will get to spend every evening driving home together as we usually do. That’s reasonable enough to ask, no?
We are only human, we only need this much.
The next morning you tell me you are feeling dizzy when we wake. I take you to the medical centre and the doctor says it’s an ear infection. Nothing a couple days of rest won’t cure. I take you home, see that you eat something and take your medicine and then it’s the bed for you. I take the day off, and am grateful to work for a company who allows me to, who is as human as we are. Not an inanimate agency but a company of fellow women and men, human like us, people who understand.
I do the laundry. I clean up. I get us lunch. I boil some barley water and serve it hot with a fresh squeeze of lime juice, the green wedges slowly turning yellow in the heat of the drink. You love this. What good fortune to be able to do this. What good fortune to be able to care for the ones we love.
Things go wrong. Tragedies happen. We get sick, get hurt, get injured. Illness and ill will threaten to do us in every single moment. And so they may. All the more reason to be thankful for the precious opportunities we have to be good to each other, to show we care, to love the way the word is meant to be used, as a verb, to love. To know of our good fortune and have the grace to share our bliss.
Every day is a good day. It has always been.
.
.
What We Have Been Up To, Part II
.
HONG KONG ISLAND (香港島) & CHEUNG CHAU (長洲) • Hong Kong Special Administrative Region, The People’s Republic of China.
.
Copyright © 2011 Kenny Mah Ying Fye. Pictures by Devil CK & Kenny Mah.
Kenny Mah believes in the good in people. He has been blogging for over ten years. No, his hands aren't tired. Yet.
Ooh! Lovely coffees!
@Ooi SHien Lung: Oh, they were the cutest – and we keep ooh-ing and aah-ing ever the louder as each new cup arrived, each prettier than the last one!
but some days are only half a good day. or three-quarters a good day. but yeah, i guess the trick is to be grateful for that half, or for that three-quarters :D
@Sean: The half or the three-quarters can be very good indeed.
Dear Kenny -
*sigh*
I want me one of those ‘come home to’s’ too … :D
Like. Seriously.
Again, you move me in ways only words could … thanks! :) You should write more books and sell them. I’d be first in line! :) Well, maybe second after Devil … but he gets them free. :P ;)
Back to work now …
Ken.
@Kenneth: Devil wouldn’t be happy simply with free books; he’d want the lion’s share of the royalties! (Or do I mean the Devil’s share, haha.)
Here’s to your “come home to” coming soon. *hugs*
Now that’s how we should count our blessings. It’s the everyday things in life that gives us our reason of being, our purpose. Even when things are downright shitty sometimes, it’s important that we can keep our chins up high and say, “at least I still have this.”
Thanks for this. For reminding me of how wonderful simple pleasures in life can be.
Hugs
@alilfatmonkey: And when we run out of fingers or toes with which to count our blessings, we know we have many blessings indeed.
*HUGS*
You are full of loving deeds,
Forever thoughtful of the Devil’s special needs,
Today and tomorrow, your whole life through,
I’m sure he will always love and cherish you.
*hugs*
@jemima: Ah! A poem! Been missing these verses, hehe.
Here’s to one who is full of loving deeds
Too; from loving hand to whom she feeds
With sustenance and smiles and simple care
Every day, whether weathered with woe and wear
You are an angel who loves through and through
We learn, we are humbled by example, by you.
*hugs*
You’ve absolutely hit the nail on its head, for this gloomy Fri morning. There is much to be thankful for, but nothing quite like the quiet, tender blessing to be able to give and receive love wrapped up in the simplest, small acts of kindness. Although.. I must say, I’ve yet to be on a receiving end for a food-filled trip away for my birthday! Will have to fix that, won’t I! :-P
@minchow: Oh you must, you surely must. Or do I mean another party, a better half?
On the other hand, you might just well get spoiled rotten like my little Devil here…
Hey good to have u back – u been MIA for some time! We all miss ya too!
@Pureglutton: I am glad to be back too – no more flying for the rest of the week – and miss all of you most assuredly. Your comments and the stories you share always make my day.
beautiful post.
after reading about the horrors in Norway and the rail accident in china I suddenly become overcome with fear with the thought of having something happen to a love one of mine.
makes one think how it’s so important to live for today and soak up all the time with family and friends.
and what, you’ve reciently been to hong kong.
you should have gone last year when I was still living there!
@mr sekimachihato: Soak up all the time – that’s a really real way of putting – I feel like a greedy sponge doing just that right now.
Every minute, every moment, counts for so much.
Yup, we were in Hong Kong and Macau for Devil’s birthday but don’t worry – let’s just say we are heading in your current direction in a couple of months… *winks*
Things have been up and down for me. in life. in a month. in a week. in a day. even in an hour.
I always hope that life would be smooth sailing but if it’s so darn good all the time, i become ignorant, complacent… unaware. i feel that i love the good things in life but i feel that it is the worse bits that make me appreciate the good things in life.
:)
@Michelle Chin: Yeah, a life that is smooth sailing all the time would be both boring and create a situation where we become less appreciative for what we have.
Difficult times make more grateful hearts.
Hope things get better soon, dear.
That’s life Kenny! I’ve been in negative ambiance recently, I always hope that things will be better soon, really soon~~
@Choi Yen: I really hope things get better for you soon too, dear – in fact, I know they will!
*HUGS*
Good reminder, Mr Mah…that to love is a verb, which is to put loving into action instead of just saying it.
Love this post. ^0^
@chuishia: Yup, nothing beats action. Devil says I say “I love you” far too often but I don’t believe it. You can never tell someone you love that you love them and to show it with action too much.
To alilfatmonkey, I thought you will say ‘oh, very sweet-nya!’ hahahaha.
@Devil: Muahahahahaha… *wipes tears from eyes*
Evil Devil. Heh.
I would’ve. But I’ll cut him some slack today. Cos he’s been tired from traveling and busy taking care of you…. Come to think of it…”Omg, that’s just too f**king sweet!”
Have a good weekend guys!
@alilfatmonkey: Knew you couldn’t resist it for long, hahaha…
You have a fab weekend, Monkey Boy! *HUGS*
yeah, anything can happen to anyone anytime, we just got to be appreciative.may we all always stay in a state of gratitude and be in a stress free thought, i know the latter may sounds a little hard to achieve… i got a feeling that you are someone that really know how to distract yourself from worries and feeling good all the time! barley with lime?? is that good?
@lena: I doubt anyone can feel good all the time, and I’m hazarding a guess that that isn’t the point anyway. Even the briefest moments of contentment can be good enough.
And the barley with lime when served piping hot is… Divine. Un-surpass-able. Sublime, even.
tukar topik sekejap, ya: i’d love to hear what you think of captain america (i’m assuming you’ll catch it sometime in the coming week). y’know how i was kinda meh about thor, mildly favorable on x-men: first class, and generally appreciative for green lantern? i’d say captain america is the only one i’d be happy to watch again. my FAVORITE superhero movie this summer (and probably since spider-man 2), and the only one in a long time that really captures the spirit of the comics. humor, heart, charm, suspense, thrills; it’s got it all. the perfect appetite-whetter for the avengers :D
@Sean: I would say of all the comic characters you have mentioned brought to screen, Captain America excites me the least… which is probably a good thing for this may mean I have lower expectations of the film ahead of viewing it.
Although all these excellent reviews of it coming in is certainly not helping to lower the bar, yours included! Hahaha…
True … I collected X-Men with the utmost dedication for a decade, and I still have at least 50 issues of Thor in my permanent collection. But Captain America was never on my buying list. The goody-two-shoedness just kept me at arm’s length, literally, at the newsstand. But there’s something about the film adaptation that restores one’s faith in film adaptations. I want a Captain America 2! :D
@Sean: Exactly.
But I’ve always appreciated the distinction between the source material and the adaptation (be it comic/book to film or vice versa)… and when we are truly fortunate, both versions are excellent.
With comics that have decades-old histories, we are bound to get good stories, bad ones and more often than not, the mediocre variety. I know Mark Waid had a good run on Captain America, did he not? And one of my favourite artists John Cassady (he of The Planetary fame) has illustrated Captain Goody-Two-Shoes too. So there you go.
Here’s to Captain America 2!
omg the food pics!! you just made me hungry. again! and the barista in 香港 sure knew how to work that coffee!
@luuworld: Oops. Sorry. I do seem to have a knack for making folks go hungry at the oddest of hours, haha.
And oh yes, that barista certainly knew her stuff! We loved the faces in the foam!
you know, i really like that first paragraph of urs
(ok, not the VERY first paragraph- “things go wrong”- but the one after).
it’s so simple yet we ignore it all the time- the fact that things CAN and WILL go wrong. sometimes, it may very well seem logical to stop asking WHY, becos it seems futile. wat do u think?
@Jun: My point exactly. Why make oneself miserable trying to prevent change when one knows change will come anyhow? Easier to embrace it and roll with the punches.
There is no Why.
Hey Kenny,
I too am currently dealing with a fairly painful change (adjusting to not having someone to talk to every day about the good and bad things). It always seems that whole “roll with the punches” is a lot easier said than done. Sigh. I’ll find that someone someday, it would just be nice to find him sooner rather than later. ;) I am very happy you have your good fortune though. You totally deserve it.
@Shannon: I guess that’s why we keep learning. Even when the going gets tough, it’s not insurmountable. I hate to use this cliché but what doesn’t kill us, really does make us go stronger.
You’ve been there for me during the worst times I’ve been through, always a brick. Know that I’m here for you too, dear.
*HUGS*
oops, i forgot to reply to this one. speaking of adaptations, are you interested in ‘game of thrones’ … i only heard of it because of the hype over the tv series, and i saw a dvd box set at the store recently, but i’m wondering whether to get into it. the reviews sound strong, but i’m wary because it seems to be a complex saga with tons of characters … and i can barely tell my aragorn from my boromir. i know i’ll never read the books, because they sound too densely plotted for me, so i’m contemplating whether to try to watch season one of the series or not…
@Sean: I’ve actually been reading the first book in the series (aptly named ‘A Game of Thrones’; actually the books came first, then the TV series, so it’s probably the other way round) and I enjoy it though there’s quite a bit of it. Over 1,000 pages, unless I’m mistaken.
I would say go for it; I’ve heard many a good review from friends. Just don’t tell me what happened – I’m only midway through the first book!
right-o. it’s on my to-get list for box sets then. btw, i just finished watching kate winslet’s ‘mildred pierce’ made-for-tv miniseries, and while it was entertaining enough and well-mounted, it didn’t quite have the same emotional impact as her previous period pieces (‘the reader’ and ‘revolutionary road’). i assume she’ll win the emmy for it though. if you’d like to invest about five hours of your time in watching her glide across the screen in 1930s dresses, let me know and i can pass the set to you :P
p.s. it’s a good thing you don’t read entertainment weekly, cos they’ve spoiled one of the plot twists from the book/tv show already! and hmmm, 1,000 pages of densely plotted stuff. if i read a page a day, i guess i’d only be done in 2014 :D
@Sean: Yeah, I heard the same about ‘Mildred Piece’ being sufficiently good but not exactly overwhelming either.
So. Pass that set over anyway! *chuckles*
P.S. Yikes. I hate hate HATE spoilers!
Okies, will do, when we do our buka puasa this month. And I guess you’ll be happy to take the Game of Thrones box set off my hands too eventually (if I ever do buy it. I may buy The Walking Dead and The Killing first).
Not sure if you’ve read the reviews for Rise of the Planet of the Apes yet, but I’m truly intrigued by how polarized the opinions are. I was gonna skip it at the theaters and wait for the DVD, but now I’m keen to see it and form my own opinion. And everyone’s gushing over the climactic scene at San francisco’s iconic bridge and Andy serkis’ supposedly brilliant performance isn’t helping! :D
@Sean: I’ve a good feeling you would buy it. Unsure whether you’d enjoy it though. It’s definitely more sexual than ‘The Lord of the Rings’, which gives it that added depth of realism…
I’ve not read the reviews and only found out today that ‘Rise of the Planet of the Apes’ is already in theatres. I’d totally go watch!
your premonition came true! i did buy ‘game of thrones’ after all (but partly because i couldn’t find ‘the walking dead’ or ‘the killing’ at the store _ hmmmm, maybe those were sold out because they’re more popular) :P
i’ve only watched three episodes so far, but it’s more fun than i’d expected and not confusing at all. and the characters are surprisingly vivid (thanks to the strong script and acting). and yes, realistic, but not because of the sexuality, but because there are no hobbits or wizards running around (so far) :D
i should be done with the box set soon and can also hand it over to you. bila nak buka puasa bersama-sama? unless work intrudes (and i have a sinking feeling that it will, these next few days), i’m open monday, wednesday or thursday this week…
@Sean: Ah, and so it came to pass. *snickers*
I’m trying my best to finish the first book (just past the midway point!) before I watch a single episode of the series since I absolutely loathe spoilers. This way, I can also observe how the series condenses the novel and perhaps take a few necessary creative liberties.
And the magic part hasn’t started in the book either. I’ve a feeling that only comes (if at all) later in the series (the books, not the film adaptation).
I’ll be travelling again this week so Thursday evening’s the earliest I can manage. That sounds good to ya?
maybe you could try watching season one and reading the first book SIMULTANEOUSLY. that would be fun and something different, no? :D
i’ve finished four out of 10 episodes liao, so i’m probably almost where you are, plot-wise! alas, they tried to squeeze 10 episodes into three discs, so the first disc contains four hour-long episodes, rendering the final 15 minutes of episode four unplayable. thank goodness for episode recaps online :D
thursday is fine, but if this week is too hectic for you, the following week would be fine too (either tues, aug. 16, or wed, aug 17) :D
@Sean: Simultaneously? Probably cause spontaneous combustion of the mind from too many overlapping storylines (assuming some differ between the book and the TV series).
We just got back from watching Captain America – I loved it, as I thought I would, whereas Devil found it terribly cheesy and uninspired. He’s not getting the 1940′s comic book references and homage, unfortunately. Ah well.
Thursday works for us. Ramen at Pavilion?
i’m now at episode eight of ‘game of thrones’! less than three more hours to go! :D
y’know what i also appreciated about ‘captain america’: the movie took its time to develop his character before making him a superhero. it reminded me that for the best comic book characters, they’re just as interesting before they got their powers as after =)
thursday is good and ramen is also good, and so is pavilion. i actually was at pavilion this weekend too, checking out a new dim sum place called ‘new shanghai,’ on the food court level, next to mercato. it’s quite good and reasonably priced, but it’s pork-free :D
@Sean: I am so far behind you, then. Film is speedier than paper, I guess.
I found Steve Rogers every bit as interesting before he became Captain America as he did after, perhaps more so. One can’t help but root for the underdog, especially one keeps standing up to bullies even when he no match for them.
Decent dim sum? I’ve had such a poor run with dim sum in the past that I’ll try anything, even if it’s pork-free!
*spoiler-free comments below, don’t worry* :D
since last we chatted (a lifetime ago!), i finished the ‘game of thrones’ box set. while it was engrossing (i stayed up till 4 a.m. on a weeknight to watch the final episode), i dunno whether i wanna watch any more after this. the characters are so vicious. so unlike ‘lord of the rings,’ where the themes of friendship, trust and goodness were dominant. ‘game of thrones’ just made me feel rather dirty and despairing :P
i also caught ‘rise of the planet of the apes’ and didn’t like it. i think one has to be a fan of primates to really enjoy it :D
@Sean: The characters are vicious, aren’t they? Even the kids. Even the supposed good kids. I guess they are more real and human this way, no?
Me, I’m at the point of the book where a major character has unexpectedly met his end at the tusks of a porcine game…
P.S. We’re watching ‘Rise of the Planet of the Apes’ at noon tomorrow – let’s hope we enjoy it more than you do.
P.P.S. Was away for work in Penang and got food poisoning – hence the lack of comments and chatting. Apologies.
realism is OK, but i like escapist fantasy better. and yes, the king is indeed dead. but that pales in comparison to what lies ahead! :P
p.s. i dunno what to watch next. ‘horrible bosses’ perhaps. something less depressing than both ‘game of thrones’ and ‘planet of the apes’ :D
p.p.s. oh no! evil penang food hawkers! hope you get better soon. we’ll celebrate your recovery with ramen or something. and you never need to apologize.
@Sean: Really? Oh dear. Not sure my heart can take all the excitement – and I’m not even three-quarters of the way through the book, I don’t think!
P.S. ‘Horrible Bosses’ sounds fab! The thought of Evil Kevin Spacey and Evil Jennifer Annistion makes me feel all warm and gooey inside. Tee hee.
P.P.S. Aww. So sweet. Ramen sounds like the perfect healer to me!