I had the most unusual dream last night.

For some reason or another, I woke up at 4.30 a.m. (I know, cuz the first thing I saw when I flicked the light switch was my damned alarm clock, just sitting there grinning at me. You know something’s terribly wrong with your life when you get mocked by domestic appliances.)

Which was strange, cuz these days I sleep impossibly well, if from fatigue. I guess yesterday I did get into bed before midnight, which was a first for me in a week, so that must have been it. I remember being rather tired still, yet also feeling a certain, nondescript urge to be vertical.

Must be a loo call.

So I got out of bed for an early morning sprinkling of the daisies, so to speak. I opened my room door and there, lying on the floor, blocking my path to the bathroom, was a naked girl in a sleeping bag.

Now, boys and girls, if you have been paying attention, you would figure out rather easily which of the above occurrences is not a normal event for Papá Chenni.

I considered this nubile and softly murmuring creature of unearthly delectability before me and decided I must be dreaming. A typical next step for me at this stage would be to, well, let’s not discuss my nocturnal fantasies in waking hours, not less you happen to be a nubile and softly murmuring creature of unearthly delectability and wish me to do something about it.

Which gets me back to my point (in a roundabout way); I chose not to do anything about it and reckoned returning to bed would be a good idea. I guess it had been pretty surreal for me already with all the dullness and dreariness of a dead day (howzat for alliteration, huh?) and I was just beat.

Bear with me a bit more, I’m getting to the punchline. (I hope.)

As a result of these early morn shennanigans, I got up much later than I wanted to, about ten or later. I stepped out of my room for my shower, and there, in the kitchen, sitting round the table like a small family, was my apartmentmate Josef, his girlfriend Anja and the nubile and softly murmuring creature of unearthly delectability.

Eyes popped out and jaw dropped to my knees.

I rubbed my eyes wondering if I was still dreaming. Eventually I gathered enough sense to find out that the nubile and softly murmuring creature of unearthly delectability was Anja’s sister. Josef picked them up at the airport, fresh from their Griechische Urlaub and plopped them here in our apartment. Obviously Anja took to the bed with him, so the nubile and softly murmuring creature of unearthly delectability got booted out to the hall.

Right.

Dear readers, thank the many deities we choose to believe in times of trouble, that your beloved Blogmaster swerved from his “typical next step” last night. Would have been hell to pay.

This explained how weird I was around the girls as they seemed to follow me, taking the same buses and subway trains as me, all the way to the uni. I take this space to apologise and can only blame my reaction as reprehensible upon finding a girl sleeping in my dream.

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Copyright © 2002 Kenny Mah Ying Fye.