Here is a burger for my best bro.
When you next visit Bangkok, let us hit the gym first and lift some weights. Yes, we’re crazy that way. What’s travel without some sweat and barbells to whet our appetite, to get us really famished for some fuel?
That’s when I’ll drag you into a nondescript soi in my beloved neighbourhood of Ari, where all you’ve been hearing about are the best places for coffee and pad krapao. Well, I’ve a surprise for you, man.
Almost every other shop here, a straight row capped by a blue canopy of Est Cola logos, is closed. Which makes it easy to identify our destination, closer to the end of the soi. But you’d be able to find it, even blindfolded, from the unmistakable aroma of butter and bacon grease on a hot smoking griddle.
Welcome to Barney’s Burger Joint, where the hardworking crew behind the counter serves up American style burgers. No frills, no fuss.
The menu is intentionally spartan: burgers and grilled cheeses, basically. No fries, no drinks. (Feel free to grab a cold one from the nearest “7”, as the locals call the ubiquitous konbinis.)
You might go for what my better half ordered: a Bacon Cheeseburger with a pork patty, plus a PB & J – crunchy peanut butter, cheese and blackcurrant jam – sandwich to share afterwards.
The Grilled Cheese would satisfy the even most hardcore, with a trio of cheeses (cheddar, mozzarella and provolone) sandwiched between two greased grilled slices of bread.
But if you’re like me, and I know you are, you’d go for The American Trucker too. Crispy crust beef patties, melted double cheese and smoked bacon. And you’d ask for two patties, as I did, for why would we settle for just one when we can have twice the fun?
(And twice the meat. Go on, launch the puns. We’ve heard it all. Really.)
Honest-to-goodness food. Fuel for our pumps. So that we may hit the weights again and return for more buns and beef. Yes, sir.