, New Zealand

Limited time only

What the southernmost McDonald’s in the world can teach us about life

By Kenny Mah

We are such tourists, we tell ourselves.

We’ve been to the highest Starbucks in the world, in Cusco, Peru. This was entirely by accident; we were in the city of Cusco because it’s where everyone stopped at, right before they headed to Machu Picchu. We didn’t even know there was a Starbucks at Plaza de Armas, much less of its record-breaking status. (No idea what the Incans would have made of a triple venti soy, no foam latte.)

Now we hear that the southernmost Starbucks in the world is in Invercargill, where we’re stopping for lunch before continuing to Queenstown. We might as well, we tell ourselves. We are tourists, after all. And we’ll need our caffeine after our lunch if we’re to stay awake for the drive.

But first: some lunch. And, of course, if the town’s Starbucks is the southernmost in the world, what are the chances its other fast food restaurants also carry that title? Apparently that honour falls to Invercargill’s Domino’s Pizza, Burger King and KFC too.

We fancy some McDonald’s fries though. Would the southernmost McD French fries in the world taste any different?

Well, Invercargill’s Golden Arches certainly doesn’t look any different from its sibling outlets around the world. And the fries, quite honestly, about the same. Which hits the spot for us (and for conspiracy theorists, cue endless debates on how these will survive long after mankind has passed).

That said, some things are different this far down south. I ordered the Almighty Texan BBQ burger – two Angus grass fed beef patties, double cheese, crispy bacon, caramelised onions, BBQ sauce and mayonnaise in a chilli chive bun – which isn’t on the regular menu.

It’s pretty damn good but with that long list of ingredients, that’s no surprise. Limited time only which is just like life, isn’t it?

At this point, I swear we really are tourists or at least fast food junkies. But hey, it’s about living la dolce vita while we can. At the end of the day, no records matter. Nor what others think as we bite into a burger invented by a multinational corporation, probably by committee, to hit every quadrant.

It tastes good. That’s something to rejoice in, to relish. Sweet.